1 ABOUT OUR SUDHIR BHAI: MY GURUSHREE.........................1
One who is totally in pure and sattvik living; who lives on the peak of truth and follows the religion of humanity; one who is an example of Gita in action; Who is one with Shreeji Baba (Shree Nathji) – Totally devoted and surrendered in Mind, Body, Soul to his Beloved Deity&hellip

2 INITIAL MEDITATIONS …………….6
…..On the 5th, the experience was wonderful- this golden green coming out from my body, dancing before me, playing with the purple; I would call it the green and purple dance…
Had this vision on the TV screen of a beautiful country side –
This comes many times when I am in the in between state (Alfa level of the mind)-
In it I see myself happily walking near a stream of water, with the birds around, there is brightness and glow;
The whole feeling is of being in some heavenly place; in the most enchanting of nature’s beauty….

3    JOURNEY TOWARDS: THE COURAGE TO CONFESS …………….21
…..Another new experience was getting up early at about 3.00am. Though I didn’t get out of bed, lying there I would feel great devotion for the Lord SHREEJI BABA – don’t know where the chanting came from, where the positive thoughts came from, where this feeling of divine love entered. This would last for an hour and I would fall in deep sleep again. This period I felt took me to some higher energy level….

4    SOME EXPERIENCES …………….25
…..Though aware of everything outside, I could not open eyes or stop the tears which were flowing freely non stop. I felt carried somewhere else, there was some indescribable feeling of devotion which could not be contained inside….

5    I AM A NEW PERSON …………….29
…..Well, today I am a new person – like what we say, a rebirth in greater positivity and purity…...

6    JEEV-ATMA RELATIONSHIP EXPERIENCE …………….31
…..So he went up to her and gave her the darshan of the energies which manifest instantly. The cow looked up to him with tears in her eyes, did darshans, and placed her head at his feet in love and surrender, as if she had been waiting for his moment…..

7    REALITY …………….39
……At times have to remind myself that this is a reality, not a dream. This state of mind is so different from anything I have experienced before – nothing- On the outside is important any more -People and situations are losing the hold over living- Am I going insane for feeling so differently? – Or is the whole world Mad? ……

8    “TEN YEARS” …………….44
…..It looked like the blind following the blind – no one ‘knew where to go what to do’; only it felt safe to follow what the majority were doing; what results were being achieved was never taken into account…..

9    TRUTH, JOY, LOVE, HAPPINESS …………….48
…..The Divinity as it enters shakes us up. Divine energy as it touched, the purity of the experience was mind boggling. It’s as if I am being washed up from the inside. Mind, body and soul vibrate from the intensity and I am unable to understand what happened. Strong emotions come to the surface …..

10    THE NATHDWARA EXPERIENCE …………….61
….. It seems like a dream; the experience was so heavenly, so out of this world. I spent those 50 hours in close proximity of a soul who is the unmanifest form of the Deity whose darshans we had gone for. Why, though a mystery for others, I know the reason. Understood in a small way, how energies travel from Nathdwara to Mathura….

11    A HIGH EXPERIENCE …………….65
……One thing I ask God is, after exposing me to the higher vibrations and so much of peace, how am I expected to come back to this reality and go back to the routine that was my life earlier? What I felt and what I have received are tremendously transformative…..

12    A COLORFUL EXPERIENCE …………….69
….Today as I sat in my gyan mudra; felt as if I was not there-means losing touch with the body-suddenly saw some one placing a red brown flower mala in my left palm. The giver was trying very gently to fill my palm with it-I could feel the physical touch of it-then I came back to body consciousness….

13    UNDERSTANDING DEVELOPS …………….73
….“I know what it is to be waiting eternally without fulfillment”. Life times have been spent looking and searching for the quenching of this thirst - there has never been any fulfillment; always felt empty. No one was full enough to complete this yearning – which I now understand was for the Divine……A whole process of cleansing began- it’s like a miracle – What was; what is. Wow. What a journey it’s been and what good deeds in my past has bought me in touch with all this. Yes I am lucky- very lucky indeed….

14    A SPELL BINDING EXPERIENCE …………….77
…The Manifest and the Unmanifest were there before me;
Manifest + Unmanifest = Absolute Truth; ….

15    REALIZATIONS …………….82
…I realize now I was different because I was meant to be different –
My realities were different –
My future was different.
Life wasn’t negative, just past karmas that had to be lived out before understanding came –
before help came –
grace came –
kripa came….

16    A GIFT OF DIVINE LIGHT; COLORS …………….85
….Till the connection doesn’t happen I think I shall continue experiencing this MAJESTIC MADNESS. This is what I would call the ‘chatpatana’ – it’s like a Divine longing, a crazy restlessness which makes me feel I am turning into a mad person. This as Sudhir bhai says is the “Divine passion” of the soul to be submerged with the whole – A longing and experience available to very few….

17    TWO IN ONE EXPERIENCE …………….90
….Sudhir bhai always tells me, “On this whole big earth there is no place for Krishn (God). People go to temples where there is no God but when the same God Energy is before them they cannot feel it”. During these moments have seen the eyes of Sudhir bhai in total sadness – it creates understanding about us, as the indifferent, non understanding humanity we have become….

18    MAHA EXPERIENCE: as a journey into reality (BrajYatra) …………….93
….The wearing of Shreeji’s Pujan ‘mala’ at the Mukharvind, and the Tilak of the Pujan at the Shyamkund, stirred up indescribable devotion and a feeling of complete surrender and peace – of “belonging”…. By the Grace of God and the Kripa of the Higher Energies, I find myself opening to a reality which is the truth I have to experience.
In the whole of Vrindavan jatra, I had the feeling of being some body else, not the personality Abha – I was changed in mind and soul and living as the witness, the energy which is the true consciousness…..

19    A NEW IDENTITY FOR MYSELF ………………….. 102
…Despite all the hindrances, the Mysterious entered my life and the search for the knower began – I feel secure I feel right, I feel positive – Though no longer young, with not too many years to live, I do have the confidence that these will be the best years of this lifetime. With the company and the guidance, the love and support from Sudhir bhai as a guru, a parent, a guide, a healer, a higher authority and finally a true representative of God, I hope to fulfill the purpose for which I have taken birth….

20    HOW SUDHIR BHAI BECOMES “GURUSHREE”……………….. 109
…One who is a walking temple for ShreeNathji, the title that comes to my mind is GURUSHREE – A very special title for a very special soul – A soul who is three in one….

21 GURU PURNIMA ………………………………………………….111
….It felt like Krisn’s divinity flowing and entering every pore of my being uplifting me to another level of experience – For me this experience of Guru Worship has been as sacred as the worship of Krishn. While washing those sacred feet I was transported to the memory of Jatipura, at Govardhanji, where Gurushree had watched me doing the same at Shreeji Baba’s feet with milk and water. At the time of worshipping Gurushree’s feet, felt the PAG of Shreeji Baba become alive…..

22    DARKNESS IS OVER 127
….In your eyes Gurushree, I have seen the depth of your soul – how strong, powerful, simple, and sensitive it is. How full of colors and flavors is your entire mind, body and soul. How deep and intimate is your connection with the Divine. How close you are to Shreeji Baba and how you chose not to let the world know about the realities. Staying behind the scenes and working for the benefit of humanity; one only reads about such souls in the books of the olden rishis and sants of this country……

23    A CHAIN OF EXPERIENCE – ONE……………………………. 132
…..Here is a soul, a person of God who is more interested in my birth than me. The only reason is; he has been able to see my potentialities somewhere in the interiors of my being.
Possessing the powers to see the heights this birth can take me, he keeps more faith in me than myself. He has promised an out worldly surprise for me on the 16th August 2005….

24 A CHAIN OF EXPERIENCE - TWO (My 49th Birthday) ……135
….I think I’ve been very privileged to receive this final ‘diksha’ from a guru as pure and powerful as Sudhir bhai. Gurushree was there with the total energy flowing live through him at that moment. That left palm with all the Divine flow becomes a medium for the Divine Love and Blessings. SO- WHO BLESSED ME? - WHO GAVE ME THE FINAL DIKSHA? WHOM DID I SURRENDER MYSELF TO? …

25    A FAMILY MEMBER AS A WITNESS …………………141
….The unborn soul needs the Sanskars of love more than anything else. There is enough of all knowledge in the world. The love aspect is what’s lacking all around, and causing so much of disharmony and conflicts around the world. It is very important to spread love with the coming generations….

26    POSITIVE PROGRESS ……………………………………145
….I was learning to do ‘darshans’ in the right way, with the right ‘bhao’. Out of the lakhs who go to ‘mandir’, very few actually do ‘darshan’. Today God, You have made me realize what I always longed for, was Your Presence in our lives, the lack that I always experienced was for Your love. You showed me what I had been wanting and waiting for was Your closeness and Devotion. The longing was for the Divine, for the overflowing; only I was trying to look for it in human relationships….

27    DEVOTIONAL SATSANG - CLOSE PROXIMITY ……………………………155
…….It would be expected – Shreeji Baba’s favorite bhakt and postman had been denied entry for darshans, the first time in all the years. Shreeji Baba was upset and the temple premises went haywire. Miraculously, at around 3.30pm everything cleared up and we could go sit at the Gaushala in peace. Nature has a way of showing God’s pleasure or displeasure. The next three days were very sunny, and we could go sit in the kirtan gully regularly, waiting for the darshans. No one is allowed to do improper Seva for Shreeji Baba. The right attitude and bhao is required. No dishonesty is permissible. There can be no discomfort to the guru of my guru -
Mahaguru and Lord – SHREEJI BABA.

28    BHAO AND PROGRESS……………………………162
….Except in the people close to God who have merged with the consciousness, can such a quality be felt; or else -
In a world of beggars, who will give?
All are empty in themselves, hungry for various things –
Greater name, more money, higher power –
Simply the strong desire to tower above the rest of the humanity in what ever capacity – could even be in the mask of religion! –
“Let things flow; just keep your shraddha and devotions on the highest point”. “At a lot of turning points, one is tested by the Intelligence about how ready we are to move forward”, was the explanation I got from Gurushree.
The black threads that Gurushree prepares are in the proximity of Shreeji Baba, and are given to deserving persons in the form of blessings from Him. Some are in the form of protection as required by the wearer, others to keep them connected to the powers as a form of ‘kadl’ requirement, till specific time limits. All have different lengths and intensities, according to what has to be given. At no time is it done without the consent of Shreeji Baba, and always in His Presence. It all becomes very positive for the receiver, though some are not able to maintain the faith required. Some jobs take up a lot of time and effort, but as these are outpourings for the good of others, Shreeji Baba is there to look after Gurushree.
This magnetic pull from Shreeji Baba increases the longing to be at Nathdwara and Vrindavan. That is where I belong for the soul to feel at home. The ‘Seva kunj’, the peacocks, the trees, the various ‘Vans’ – want to go spend the maximum time there…..

29    PURITY EXPERIENCED……………………………176
….Gurushree is totally surrendered to Shreeji and enjoys the utmost closeness and intimacy with Him. On the 30th was lucky to have darshans of all the three powers in full manifestation.
I was there all day. The meaning of ‘being in the moment’ I understood deeply today. The realities I witnessed, I don’t think any other human must have witnessed or experienced; what I was a part of today. It is an incredible out of the world experience. The reality experienced today was something I had not been a part of before. The experiences in these moments of totality are not human. They are 100% energy and aura experiences, and the magnetism gets very strong….

30 A DIVINE EXPERIENCE……………………………………178
…... He shares the ‘Sakha bhao’, to the fullest with Shreeji Baba; each one relies on the other and love flows freely. And I am the disciple of such a Guru and Maha Guru!!!
It is being handed to me with so much trust –
Why? I ask –
“Your destiny, Your karma – Your naseeb”. “You are very lucky that you’ve been found and the soul awakened, before it got too late”, says Gurushree.
Or else, who knows how many births more would’ve passed by, if Grace had not entered my life in the form of Gurushree….... The darshans were very magnetic, and standing there in front of Shreeji Baba, I have this bhao of wanting to go and hug Him. As He stands there, looks so attractive; how can anyone not want to go fall at His feet and touch Him. The force is that strong it is impossible to move away from the charm and magic of Shreeji Baba. There were moments when the feeling of purity and devotion and love got so strong – these extraordinary feelings had to come from some inner dimensions. Feel like a different person altogether……

31    ZERO ZONE …………………………………………………………182
……In a world where money is the universal language all is accepted as right; as the larger the number of zeros with a name the loudest his truth is heard –
I feel the moment we forget our realities and get involved only in figures and calculations; it becomes a total outward journey-only moving on the circumference of the big zero. If you – your soul, your dot – are the stronger one, this zero then has to bow down to the real you. Then it is your slave instead of ruling over your life or senses. Then you have gained freedom for yourself and are your own master; free from the raag-dwesh-lobh of the outer dimensions…..

32    ME AND ONLY ME: a poem………………………186
…I need more money
I need more fame
I need more power
How can I waste time on what gives me none of this
Life is so short,
I have to fill my bank accounts……

33    IMPORTANCE OF TIME………………………187
….Without neglecting any worldly responsibilities, I have to move fast. I cannot miss the opportunity provided by God to experience the highest peak and bliss – I have to move deeper – I know what I want to do and there will be no human power to stop me from reaching the highest summit of spirituality and God realization.
I can see Shreeji Baba smiling at me as I write this. With His hand on my head like an umbrella, I have all the protection and blessings I need…..

34    A SHOCKING EXPERIENCE………………………189
…The burst of stars saw right in front of my eyes, at Gurushree’s office –
They look like drops of gold suspended in the air –
Brilliant, dazzling and beautiful….

35    AN EXPERIENCE IN LIVE URJA!!………………………192
….This high energy level requires the highest in purity and bhao to be able to stay within the structure (Body), along with one’s soul energy – it soon becomes a part of one’s own soul as the energy goes deeper….

36    WHO HAS VISITED!!!………………………………193
…..The only essentials I saw with Gurushree were a lot of bhao and purity. He does not need ‘Mantras’ or various rituals and hours of ‘pujan’ for the ‘Sthapan’ of Shreeji. Only his bhakti is the pull to get the Presence and Blessings of the Energies. They never refuse him as truth is there in total. Gurushree says that Shreeji Baba is such a magnet of love; automatically a person is drawn to Him.
‘HE’ enters wherever ‘HE’ wants and sits there with a mischievous smile, “What will you do now, I am here”. Some may think of it as a picture, but I know Shreeji Baba is there ‘Live’ with all His blessings and Love….'

37    AN EXPERIENCE IN INNER DIMENSIONS………………………………199
…It feels as if there is gold below the surface of the skin which shines out….

38    DESTINY AND GRACE………………………………………………201
……Past karmas lead us to a destiny which has to be fulfilled, and here I am – the most pure and sattvik – with the grace of my Gurushree, writing this book .Its been like a journey from the lowest to the highest; lowest being the outer dimensions and highest the inner; where the “DOT” is in my life….

39    AN EXPERIENCE IN BLISS ………………………………………………205
….Gurushree has told me, “As the levels rise the purity will also increase and you have to maintain certain priorities. The body slowly is converted into a temple for the ‘Jeevatma’ inside and that is very sensitive; so rules for the maintenance of purity have to be followed. Other changes come on their own, as the Intelligence finds its own methods”.
Again saw this burst of stars around myself – 8-10 seconds.
These are the gifts I receive from my Gurushree. I like calling them ‘Gifts of the soul’ –
Who can give them, and who are the lucky one’s to receive them? …..

40    TRUTH - FACTS ………………………………210
…Transfer of powers is a huge responsibility, and if Gurushree and Shreeji Baba have thought me worthy of receiving such high dimensional powers, it becomes my duty to live up to it and maintain total devotions and sattvikta in Mind, Body, and Soul – which are already in total surrender to Shreeji Baba…..
One of the ugly realities of our outer world I ‘experienced’ was the negative influence of money power. – “All sanskars and spiritual values take a back seat, and all actions justified as the only sanskar majority follow is money power….

41    WHO DECLARES - ‘A LAST CHAPTER’ !! - A Post man of God ……………….218
…..Today this seemingly ordinary office has been converted into the most sacred and pure temple, where I witness and experience the most incredible transformations of energies and powers. In the midst of this high flow and magnetism time just flies, till the moment I realize its time to come back to the reality we call our human lives.
“Include this incident in your writings and make it the last chapter. The 7th of April 2006 is where this book ends. Hence forth make a new book”….
I was puzzled; there were no explanations forthcoming so I just agreed. Only puzzle was –
                                      WHO SPOKE THESE WORDS - -
I have been a witness to quite a few miracles like this. How it happens have no answers.
Who can make it happen in the most sahaj manner are only GOD or a postman of God in whom the Energy can Manifest at will – the doors are open all 24 hours.